Last time...

For the past few days i keep thinking, this is the last time colten and i will do this or that, all the time. and then i think well, at least for two years, if everything works out. And it's scary, everything changing, and him leaving, and so i thought oh we have to do really fun stuff right before he leaves, we can't waste time. Well, here's what we did, everyday the past few days, we've just visited each other's houses, talked about good times, talked about the future, and laughed and cried. And ya know what? it's been better than it ever could have been. Most would think that it's gonna be just too heartbreaking those last ten minutes you get to really be with them, well i just did it, and honestly we laughed and cried up until i drove away. But i'm gonna type this because maybe i'll come back to this blog, and it will help me remember. He is my best friend. In the whole world. No one has ever been closer, and I've never cared about someone so much. No one is as silly as him, or can make me laugh the way he does. And i told him, not to think of me as a girlfriend impatiently awaiting his return, but as his best friend, who will always be there every step of the way. And so I will. And the next few years of my life, and gonna be selfish (meaning take advantage of the time i'm not married) and focus on growing as an individual and becoming the best sammy i can be. One time at girls camp we had to pretend we were writing on gold plates and we had to write out a goal. and a year later we dug them up and read what we wrote. My goal (which sadly i had forgotten) was simply to "be the best Sammy Bramall i can be" so that is my goal still today. and for the next few years. Wish me luck, cuz this will suck, but i'm ready to do it, as cinderelly says, "there's really nothing to it" and i'm gonna have a great two years.