that my midwife told me that there would be a lot of people who would tell me that I was stupid? Well, that happened today. And I didn't have my guns in their holsters ready to respond, and I was caught off guard, and it sucked...
I knew it was coming, but for the most part many people have been supportive or indifferent. But not today. I went home, received reassurance from my sister, and then my mother, and then I had a good cry.
"Why would you go back 100 years when we have the kind of technology we have?" (no response, but my response should have been... why not rely on the same method that has worked for THOUSANDS of years? instead of the technology that has only worked for how long...)
I don't know if I've posted this yet, and some may think I'm crazy...but I'm of the faith that Heavenly Father has control of who comes into this world and who leaves. I realize very much so that agency plays a role in that--and that Heavenly Father will not force us to choose anything, and thus sometimes people make choices that cause other people to lose their lives. However, I KNOW that miracles do happen, and that if it is in fact not at all a person's time to go, then Heavenly Father will make it so that he/she stays here. I also know that he is aware of every single one of His children. In reality I am carrying one of His children. He trusts me and Colten to bring this child into the world---amazingly enough He does this knowing full well that we are young, we are imperfect, and we do not know everything. But, He trusts us with an amazing responsibility. And He does this because it's part of how we become like He is--parenting is what Heavenly Father does! And He wants us to learn about patience, love, teaching with the spirit, learning how to replace fears with faith, etc. And because He is aware of every one of us, He will be there for the birth of this child. He will be as much a part of it as me, as Colten, and as the midwife, and really He is the most a part of it, because, again, it is His child. So, if something does go wrong, and in the worst case scenario Heavenly Father decides that this child shouldn't be here for any reason---as hard as that would be---He is in charge. And so knowing this, what kind of person would I be to blame a doctor, a midwife, a nurse, an assistant, or anyone there who wasn't able to keep the baby here, alive, and healthy? When it is NOT their fault. Even in cases that prove that the doctor or midwife is to blame, AGAIN, who is REALLY in charge? And should we not have faith that Heavenly Father always knows what is best for us? And for our children?
(indirect quote, but summarized) "I trust the $250,000 machines to tell me what's going on with a baby"
(no response, but my response should have been.... "Really? I trust the Spirit. And I know my midwife does too")
The Spirit, or the Holy Ghost, is right 100% of the time. That is who my midwife relies on. She rarely goes for too long speaking without mentioning who really deserves all the credit ---Heavenly Father.
Anyway, I feel better now. But today was hard.
6 comments:
I think that You're awesome! I also think that going natural is really beautiful. It's a wonderful power and Beauty that Heavenly Father has blessed with, and we should embrace it. Your Midwife sounds amazing! I really liked the Bradley Method. I just read through a book that my mom let me borrow. It really involves your husband as a coach and it's just really great. You should look into it. I have the book if you want to borrow it.
Hang in there Sam! A lot of times people say things when they don't have all the correct information, having your baby naturally is so much better in a million different ways and it's such a selfless thing too because it is so much better for your baby. I totally want to have my next baby naturally after having Scarlett with an epidural. it's just better. I'm with you!
You are so right on every level, stay strong and hold your ground, you know it's the right thing.
You are amazing! I know how it feels to be attacked, considered naive, or ridiculous, to choose a midwife. Sometimes it's really hard to not let other's comments affect you, I really wish that people would just allow other's to make those personal decisions with the Spirit. Just know that there are tons of people who support you. I know you don't use facebook much, but if you are interested, there is a group called "Hypnobirthing Utah" it's full of mom's that are very natural and midwife oriented and I have found a lot of info, had questions answered and am finding unlimited support from those ladies. Btw, I love how you mentioned Heavenly Father's part in birth, you put it so perfect.
That makes me mad. People can be so dumb sometimes. No one knows what's best for you, but you. I like your way of thinkin! I admire you, I'd prob be too much of a wuss to do it. I do love the thought it of though! Love ya!
Booo on the haters. Yay for midwives! Viva la empowered free woman!!
keep your head up and dont listen to other people. they dont know whats best for your baby, only you colten and heavenly father do :) you'll rock it!
Post a Comment